How Attachment Theory Can Power Character Development in Fiction

For the past few years, I’ve been diving deep into psychology. I don’t plan to ever be a licensed professional in that field, but I’ve been serious about in the context of understanding myself and my relationships to others.

But does psychology have a use in writing?

Sure does.

The four primary attachments

More specifically, consider attachment styles — that is, the style someone has interacting with other people because of the way they originally engaged with primary caregivers. Most models now recognize at least four attachment styles:

Secure — The ideal. The individual feels confident, has a strong sense of self-worth, and accepts different kinds of help.

Anxious — This style is characterized by intense emotions, a high need for reassurance, and “clingy” behavior.

Avoidant — Avoidant individuals tend to seem unemotional. They don’t like to get close to others. Distance is their protection.

Disorganized — This style features a combination of anxious and avoidant traits. It’s common when a person grew up in chaotic, unpredictable circumstances. The individual usually shows a lot of intensity, but yo-yos back and forth between dismissiveness and needing reassurance.

Importantly, even though there are four “categories” of attachment, many professionals see attachment more as a spectrum. For example, you might lean anxious, but be secure in some areas, or you might be disorganized with dismissive features showing up more often. But the categories offer a decent framework to mentally grasp how people often respond to caregiver treatment.

Applying attachment to characters

In young adult and adult fiction, characters most often are people — or at least, function quite similarly to the way people would. If they’re in a setting we might recognize from the real world, then it can make sense to have attachment govern the characters’ behavior.

For example, what happens in a romance where an avoidant and a disorganized individual get together? In the beginning, it might be beautiful — the disorganized individual might offer the avoidant person a lot of support and draw them out of their shell. But then, if the avoidant retreats back into their usual pattern of behavior, the disorganized individual might feel abandoned. When the disorganized person pursues, the avoidant doesn’t understand the intensity and retreats.

Or perhaps two people are both anxious. Constantly needing assurance, will they be enough for each other? Or will they seek confirmation of their worth and “okay-ness” from others in a way that destabilizes the entire relationship (e.g., cheating)?

And these scenarios assume otherwise decent mental health. What happens if things go a bit off the rails? For example, what if an anxious individual takes extreme measures to keep their romantic interest from leaving or being with someone else (e.g., stalking, murder)?

Studying how attachment styles translate into fairly predictable reactions and behaviors in different relationship combinations lets you test whether your fiction plot feels believable to readers. People might not be able to articulate in psychology terms what you’ve laid out, but they’ll likely recognize patterns they’ve seen play out in real life enough to sense whether what you wrote could happen.

The resources are plenty, so dive in

These days, there’s an enormous body of resources available to help you understand attachment theory and how it translates into relationships. If you want more believable characters and plots, take some time to get a basic grasp of attachment concepts — with increased understanding of the motivations behind each characters actions, both alone and with others, you’ll gain a deeper story.