The Biggest Mistake I’ve Ever Made in Writing
I’ve been writing now for more than two decades.
Mistakes? I’ve made ’em plenty.
But out of everything, there’s nothing I regret more than not personally networking to a greater degree.
Why I went all in on digital
When I was getting started and establishing myself, the writing industry was just starting to embrace social media. I graduated college in summer 2006 — the same year Twitter (X) launched. LinkedIn came on the scene in 2011, at at the time, as a new mom, I didn’t have much time to invest much time in it (or much at all, TBH). Plus, I’m a *cough* introvert. Just a little.
By the time I was ready to present myself professionally on social media, social media had grabbed the publishing industry by the throat. Writers were expected to build online platforms to connect with readers as part of their marketing strategy. In non-fiction, followings of 5,000 – 10,000 became considered baseline for anybody seeking a traditional publishing deal. Agents started asking for social media links in their query forms.
So, I did what most writers did — put all the extra time I had into building social media accounts. I posted multiple times a week without fail, and once I could, added more “engaging” content to the posts (e.g., videos, carousels, etc.) whenever possible with the help of Canva. Every piece of writing I did got posted, no exceptions. I’d do random one-off thought posts, too, depending on the account.
The fall of the giant
Now, though, both artificial intelligence and politics have thrown a monkey wrench into everything I built online.
As Musk took over X, my monthly impressions dropped from around 12,000 to sometimes less than 10. Followers I’d fought for fled the platform.
Algorithms are generally making it harder for people to see content from creators, even when they’ve purposely followed them. Patreon noted this — along with how frustrated creators are — in their State of Create report.
If you don’t get initial engagement on a post, most platforms treat you as unimportant and won’t show your post in the feed. And getting initial engagement usually translates to adhering to the structure and rules of the platform (e.g., LinkedIn = bullet points and single lines for almost everything instead of paragraphs). Writers who want to share deeper, longer content that prompts inner reflection instead of knee-jerk comments are penalized, and links that take people off the platform get dinged, too.
All of this makes it incredibly hard for writers to write with the voice and style they want and to promote what they’ve published outside the social media platforms. I can post something original, but my impression rate is just 5-10% what it should be, given the followers I have. That’s called a shadowban, and it’s consistent across platforms.
And at the same time, people aren’t clicking directly on links in Google searches anymore — they read the AI summaries at the top of the page. That means people might never come to the sites that allow per click revenue or the building of personal email lists.
So, at the end of the day, everything I worked to make has become significantly less visible.
And now, the work of building the other side for balance begins
The good news in all this is that I worked incredibly hard to build a strong content network. This site, my author site, and others all interlink, which means my overall digital footprint is strong. The breadth of the spiderweb becomes clear when you consider I’ve published thousands of pieces. That means that anybody I try to network with is going to see a professional history and portfolio with serious depth. I have no shortage of links I can use as I comment on other people’s posts.
But now, I’m starting from scratch building the in-person web that’s paradoxically necessary as technology booms. Had I invested time in that from the beginning and built a more balanced online-offline platform, I likely would have grown faster and would be in a better position to tap others with the right resources and expertise.
So, here’s my strategy going forward:
- Pinpoint specific niche groups to reach out to (e.g., editors, other writers)
- Clarify the goals behind the different connections with each niche group (e.g., speaking, publishing)
- Pick 1 to 3 online platforms (e.g., Substack, LinkedIn) to engage on, selecting specific users, newsletters, and hashtags that are relevant to my goals; DM 2-3 people per week
- Use online platforms (e.g. Facebook, Eventbrite), podcasts and newsletters to find/join local meetups, workshops, author signings, writing groups, etc.
- Attend at least 1-2 in-person events per quarter that likely will have high value (e.g., Christian Writers Conference, Association of Writers and Writing Programs, book clubs, critique circles), messaging speakers or other attendees to connect in advance when possible and showing an interest in the projects of others
- Host my own events (e.g., readings, workshops, weekly meetups); create 1 in-person opportunity per month — even lunch with a writer friend is fine!
- Follow up with new contacts within 48 hours, preferably with an invitation, encouragement, resource, etc. — handwritten notes count!
- Use a spreadsheet or other tool like Trello to remember follow-ups
These points are doable regardless of whether you’re just penning your first piece or have been in the trenches for years like I have. And even if you have a decent network, they can help you expand it.
Remember — relationships, not followers
I can’t go back and change what I did. I’m proud of what I’ve digitally published. But if you’re a new or beginning writer, learn from my blunder and invest in building relationships rather than a following. The two go hand in hand, but when one technology gets eclipsed or changes, it’s the relationships that won’t shake.
[Transcript summary]
As somebody who has been writing for basically two decades now, I have made a ton of blunders through my career. You know, I’ve sent the bad queries, I’ve done — I’ve done it all.
But the one thing that I really regret not doing is making in-person connections and building my face-to-face network. Because basically, when I was starting out, social media was just catching on and really getting in gear. And so, I pretty much put all my eggs in that basket, and that was the way that the industry really had started to go. And so, every writer on the face of the planet pretty much went in that direction in terms of building platform.
But now, I would tell you, please, do the in-person, make those connections. You know, you can — you can use social media and online resources to build an offline network. You know, they are interconnected. But don’t just rely on the online things, because it’s too volatile that — you know, social media can crash. You know, platforms go offline. So, you really do need to have that in-person network, balance the online things that you are doing.
That’s my one regret. If I could tell you anything, build them in balance.
Take care. Bye.